


Vice Versa

by lesbianneptune



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Body Swap, F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-21
Updated: 2015-06-21
Packaged: 2018-04-05 11:04:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4177431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianneptune/pseuds/lesbianneptune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seiya wakes up after a rough night. The ordeal that follows is far worse than she could ever have expected. Seiya v Haruka/Yaten v Michiru ficlet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Vice Versa

**Author's Note:**

  * For [QueenUsagi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenUsagi/gifts).



Seiya grumbled as she sat up, rubbing at the bump on her head in confusion. Last night was something of a blur – they had started at Haruka and Michiru’s house, that much she remembered, but the details after that were messy, the memories washed away in alcohol. Now, she was lying on the floor of her own bedroom, clothes scattered around her, the lamp in the corner knocked over and the bedsheets strewn on the floor.

“What the fuck happened last night?” Seiya thought as she reluctantly dragged herself to her feet, her legs stiff and her neck aching. She turned to look in the mirror (there was no doubt her ponytail would need a good brush after sleeping on the floor for so long) and screamed.

In the mirror was Haruka Tenoh’s half-naked body.

Seiya yelled and threw the nearest pillow, knocking the mirror and the offending sight out of the way. Steadying her breathing, she turned towards the door and shouted;

“Yaten, I don’t know what the fuck kind of trick you just pulled but don’t ever do that again!”

A mumbled reply came from somewhere outside the door and Seiya snapped in response.

“I mean it, Yaten! I don’t wanna see Haruka’s non-existent tits this early in the morning, I’ll throw up!”

“I didn’t do shit!” a voice yelled back, and Seiya frowned.

That didn’t sound like Yaten at all.

Stumbling, she opened the door and peered into the hallway. On the top step lay none other than Michiru Kaioh, her dress unusually rumpled and stained, her hair tangled for the first time potentially ever, Seiya thought.

Last night must have been really rough.

“Uh, hey. Sorry about that thing about Ruka’s tits. I’m sure they suit you just fine, anything more than a handful is too much, whatever you tell yourself.”

“Haruka, what the fuck are you on about?” Michiru replied, dragging her hands down her face. Seiya balked.

“What?”

“Run along will you, your ugly face is worsening my hangover.”

Seiya stepped back, eyes wide.

“Yaten?”

“Uh…yes, Haruka?” Michiru-who-was-not-Michiru frowned.

“You’re…you’re Yaten…” Seiya looked dumbfounded, “I…just look in the mirror would you?”

Sighing, Yaten reached for the compact she always kept in her top pocket, but found it nowhere.

“Hmm…I’ve never seen this dress before…god, I must have been so pissed, it’s fuck ugly. Did you let me fish this out of the trash or something?”

“Just. Go in your room. And look in the mirror.” Seiya said slowly.

“Alright, don’t be so pissy, god. There’d better be something important on my f-WHAT THE FUCK!??? HARUKA WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE!???”

“Why do you keep calling me-OH MY GOD!” Seiya joined Yaten’s screaming as she rounded the corner and caught sight of herself in the mirror. Her hands flew to her chest, where there were no boobs, to her hips where there was nothing, to her ridiculously long and lanky legs.

Seiya was the human equivalent of an inflatable air dancer.

Seiya had the body of Haruka Tenoh.

Tears leaked from the corner of Yaten’s eyes (this was an odd experience for Seiya – she’d never before seen Michiru cry, and it was a terribly jarring image) as she pulled her fingers through her hair.

“Haruka…I’m so ugly…HELP ME, I’M SO UGLY!!!”

“YATEN YOU FUCKING DUMBASS IT’S ME, SEIYA! IT’S ME! BUT IT’S NOT ME, I’M STUCK IN THIS FUCKING RAKE BODY!!!”

“What Gods did I scorn to deserve this?” Yaten fell to her knees, small whines escaping her mouth, pulling whisps of aqua hair from her head, “What Gods, Seiya??”

“This…this has to be a dream. It has to be. There’s no way…unless…could Mina have done this? Is she capable of this?”

“Whoever has done this. I will rip their fingernails off one by one until they GIVE ME BACK MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!”

Suddenly, a scream came from the other end of the house and Seiya froze.

“Do you think that could be-“

“MICHIRU!!! MICHIRU I’VE GOT A PONYTAIL!!! MICHIRU GET THE SCISSORS I DON’T KNOW WHATS HAPPENING! MICHIRU HELP ME GOD PLEASE!!!”

“Yeah, we’ve switched bodies,” Yaten groaned, wiping the tears from her cheeks and turning from the mirror in distaste.

“Huh?”

“There’s no way that was anybody but Haruka. Who else do you know who would cry for her wife to cut off a ponytail?”

“Fair point.”

Downstairs, Taiki and Setsuna sat, quietly sipping tea.

“So,” Taiki began, “do you think this will teach them to be slightly more sensible on their nights out?”

Setsuna twirled her tea around in her cup as she thought.

“Hm…I shouldn’t think so. Still, I’m quite enjoying experiencing another body. The ponytail is a really nice touch, you know.”

Taiki smiled.

“Still, I expect we’ll need to change things back before…well, I wouldn’t want blood on our hands,” Setsuna continued. Taiki fiddled with the radio, before deciding on a three lights track.

“I have the Kinmokun antidote, no worries. I say we let them live it out for another couple of hours, then step in before one of them kills the other.”

From upstairs, the screaming came again as Seiya threw herself at Haruka, shouting about wanting her boobs back.

“You always have such great ideas, Taiki.”


End file.
